the not wanting

There was a time when I wanted. And what I wanted, I worked to get. Or played to get. Whatever it was, the wanting of it fired my spirit, made me make the moves toward the pleasure of getting.

But there is no point in wanting these days because wanting without the freedom to go after what I want hurts more than not wanting anything at all.
And so I don’t want anything at all. Nothing.

6 thoughts on “the not wanting

  1. I get what you’re saying, I think, but nothing lasts forever. You do have control over changing the expectations for what you want within whatever framework or limitations exist. You, also, can have a “want list” for an unknown future time. If you’re content with wanting nothing, then ignore what I’ve just written.

  2. Of course I’m not content. And the rest of what you wrote is quite on the money. I can only hope that my health won’t wear out before I get to my long-term “want list.”

  3. I’ve been reading your blog for a while now. I can’t remember how I found it, but I really like it. This post particularly has me interested. Isn’t the point of life “wanting”? Desire seems to be a the core of who we as humans are. I know this time is coming in my life (I’m 41)…I don’t know how I will handle it. I’ve always said I wanted to leave “here” w/ a lot undone…

  4. Thank for leaving your comment. I checked out your weblog, which comes from a very different place than mine. I’m surprised you read mine, given that I’m outspokenly irreligious.
    Yes, desire IS part of the core of what it means to be human. That’s why my choice of situation, which makes it impossible to achieve what my desires would be, is draining me at the core.

  5. Sometimes words speak louder than we think. Your statement of determination to stop wanting screamed of all the wants you are holding deep down inside. I know I am not in the same situation as you, but there are times I understand how you feel. I used to have a life, I used to be able to go and do the things I enjoy. Now I do what I have to do, what needs to be done. But why does that mean losing ourselves in the process?? I am just starting to squeeze out time for myself when I can, but it is too little, and not near often enough. Don’t stop wanting! It is what will keep you moving forward until the time you can start “having” again.

  6. Thanks for checking out my blog. I guess the fact that you are “outspokenly irreligious” is one of the things that attracts me here. I’m pretty much on the “outside” when it comes to most of the religious people I know. I find I fit better w/ irreligious people…they generally don’t burn (or crucify) people as quickly as the religious people do ;). So, thanks for letting me hang out here.

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