Rain Rage

that’s what I’m feeling right now. it’s not just the actual rain, which is hard enough to take day after day. it’s all of the circumstances of my life that are raining on my parade — circumstances that include my desktop computer not being able to access my email or get on the internet. so I’m on my little laptop, which I’m not used to using. the point here is that right now I have no email, so anyone who needs to contact me needs to do it here or by phone.
consternation, confrontation. thats my life right now. i want to scream. sometimes I do.
she is becoming more and more childlike. doesn’t like to be alone. wants all of her belongings around her. doesn’t remember meals or meds, so everything is catered. every movement hurts. consternation underlies our interactions.
the confrontation rests with another, who doesn’t seem to know how to relate in any other way. every interaction gives me a migraine.
I’m getting out of here on Thursday to take my car to Albany for a tune-up. also taking my computer to my techie guy to figure out what’s going on there. going to visit with friends, join them for dinner, stay overnight.
just think, two whole days without consternation and confrontation.
nirvana.
i’ve been blogging less because I don’t know what to write about. every day is a repeat of the last – maybe with a few tweaks of the agenda. I get nothing done that I would enjoy doing. we are finishing up some accomodating construction. when that’s done, I’m hoping I will have more time, more focus. i can dream, cant I.
Meanwhile, Happy Birthday, b!X.
And rest in glorious peace and the glory of history, Rosa Parks

3 thoughts on “Rain Rage

  1. The crap weather I can relate to. The rest you’re confronting is beyond imagining. It can only do you good to get away for those 2 days. And yes, you can dream. Sometimes they surprise you and come true. Hang in there.

  2. crap rain I can very much relate to. With a three year old who has finally given up afternoon naps — “Mommy, I’m bored.” While I cannot breathe cuz I’m so stuffed.
    As for the rest, I repeat myself, I know, but — bring in some help. Daytime assitance even for half a day to feed, accompany, medicate so others can have time to get things done.
    And to get a break.

  3. can’t have anyone come in to help. property owner will not allow until constuction is complete. if accident, can be sued. we’ll see if owner’s attitude changes in the future. for now, I just have to persevere.

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