Comments on: decomposition

By: Bitterroot

Bitterroot — Tue, 27 Dec 2005 05:04:23 +0000

Elaine, I too have been following your journey with your mother and have been very moved by your devotion and your honesty about this experience. I wish peace for you, your mother, and your brother.

By: Tamar

Tamar — Mon, 26 Dec 2005 12:55:32 +0000

Dear Elaine,
I hold you in my thoughts.

By: Brad Belford

Brad Belford — Mon, 26 Dec 2005 11:09:40 +0000

During this introspective and trying time, our family wishes your loved ones the strength to persevere.

By: Chancy

Chancy — Mon, 26 Dec 2005 00:47:23 +0000

Elaine, this is the first time I have posted a comment on your site but the agony you and your Mother are experiencing touched me deeply. Having been a caretaker for my Mother as she aged and when she finally had to enter a nursing home it was so difficult. But in my heart I knew I was doing all I could while caring for myself and my family at home.
The last time I saw my Mother she begged me to help her, she was ready to be released and go on to the other side. I could only pray that God would look down on Lou Ella and give her peace. The next time I saw her,after my husband and I rushed to the nursing home but too late, she had passed away. I knew she was finally at peace and out of pain but I still cried like a baby and knew I would always miss her. She was 91.
Remember to take care of yourself.
Chancy.

By: Ronni Bennett

Ronni Bennett — Sun, 25 Dec 2005 14:16:31 +0000

It’s not easy, Elaine – to get through or face the decisions put before us.
My thoughts are with you…

By: Betsy Devine

Betsy Devine — Sun, 25 Dec 2005 04:17:06 +0000

Dear Elaine, Having been there as both mother and daughter, my heart goes out to you. And, since I’m already comment number 3 here, it seems you are not so alone this Christmas Eve.

By: FURIOUS nads!

FURIOUS nads! — Sun, 25 Dec 2005 04:00:28 +0000

I Am 3,000 Miles Away And Can Eat Polish Food You can find the latest updates regarding my grandmother in the comments to my original post, and in a new

By: myrln

myrln — Sun, 25 Dec 2005 03:50:35 +0000

I must agree. You’ve done more than anyone could expect of you. Your mom needs now a kind of attention beyond your knowledge/ability. I have seen many times that when the aged ailing know it’s all right for them to let go, they do. They just let their body do what it will to shut down, not always pretty or even bearable. Right now, it sounds very much like time for professional care, even if they send her home (which it sounds like they shouldn’t). You have gone as far as you can go in caring for her. Making yourself ill or crazy with trying beyond your capability is no answer. Not for you or her. And there is no shame in that. You’ve been the good daughter, the good human. Be certain of and in that. You’ve kept your promise.

By: Melissa

Melissa — Sun, 25 Dec 2005 03:03:21 +0000

There is no way to imagine how all this feels for you. For what it’s worth, you could NOT have just kept her home. You had to try, to see what was happening, to find out what, if anything, could be done. And I think, if it were all to happen again, you and I know what the decision would be. What even she would want it to be. You have been a wonder for her — even if she doesn’t know it.
“Let me go” she said. And you told her it was okay to go.
That’s all there is.